Navigating New Parenthood Abroad: Josh Madge on Surprises and Support in Amsterdam

For Josh Madge, becoming a dad in Amsterdam has been full of unexpected moments and practical adjustments. Living far from family, he’s had to find support in new places, all while discovering the quick pace of his daughter’s growth. In this interview, Josh talks about the ups and downs of his first year as a parent, sharing what surprised him most, the resources that helped, and some hard-earned advice for fellow new parents.

What has been the biggest surprise?

It shouldn't have come as a surprise really, but just how quickly they grow up. Every week she is working on something new and it has probably been the most rewarding part of parenting for me, watching her slowly unlock new abilities. Each phase is over before you know it and I'm glad I took the time to enjoy them whilst I could rather than trying to rush her forward to the next one.

What has been the biggest support?

Living in a different country to our main support networks (family, close friends etc.) has meant we have had to take all the support we can get from wherever we can get it. For me, the daycare has been the biggest support and has enabled us both to continue to give focus to our careers. Initially, we had to split Penny's time across two daycares but settling on one that really worked for us has been a huge relief. To begin with we were concerned and felt slightly guilty when we sent her at 4 months (in the UK 9-12 months is far more common) but the staff made the transition so easy and Penny really loves the time she spends there. We get updates every day with photos showing her playing and enjoying herself.

How were the first few weeks of parenthood been for you?

They were not without their challenges, but honestly the first few weeks were amazing. Having those first two weeks as a 'three' were really special, particularly before having to go back to work myself. We also felt very lucky that despite being in a different country we had all four grandparents visit during this time. Additionally, the Kraamzorg, for which there is no equivalent in the UK, was a lifesaver. We had two Kraamzorg due to scheduling conflicts and both were lovely and really looked after us when we needed it the most.

Was there a particular moment you felt really challenged? What got you through it?

There was a really challenging night quite early when I wasn’t able to get Penny to sleep for more than 10 minutes at a time. I spent hours and hours awake, getting more and more sleep deprived before finally she gave in and fell asleep. What got me through it was the knowledge that it was only temporary and many hours bingeing Frasier (in hindsight the light from the screen and my chuckles probably weren't helping her sleep).

This was a really rough night...

What’s one piece of advice you’d pass on to someone who’s about to join the parent club?

Information and advice you get from the internet, friends and family is just a guide. You have to pay attention to the baby you have rather than getting lost in the theory. For me, this was swaddling which in theory helps a baby sleep - the only issue is Penny hated being swaddled, and it took longer than I'm proud of to realise this. As a new parent, you will be bombarded with opinions and well meaning advice (I'm looking at you, boomers), and you should feel empowered to disregard any and all that you don't think will work for you.

Josh and his wife Katherine, who live in Amsterdam, took part in Prepped to Parent during Katherine’s pregnancy with their daughter Penny.