Ahh the classic meet cute... girl drops newspaper, bumps head with boy as he reaches to pick it up. But what about the mama meet cutes! We know how important mom friends can be, the ones you can reach out to in the middle of the night when you’re both awake feeding your newborns or the ones you can call to meet you in the park when you’re going stir-crazy and really need to get out of the house. We talked to four moms about the funny, unusual, and surprising ways they met their mama pal and how these friendships shaped their motherhood journeys. Meet Zyanya Kortooms Breuer, Amsterdam-based babywearing consultant and mama to Rem (4.5 years old) and Ravi (14 months), and client-turned friend Gaia who's mom to Léon (19 months).
Tell us about your mom friendships; has there been a difference for you between the friends you made since you've become a mother versus the friends you had before (who maybe have kids now too)? With the friends that you have before you become a mom, there's this unequal balance of experience, especially if you have kids at different times of your life. And if you have a long history together as friends, it's almost harder to give each other advice. I think that with the women I've connected with since becoming a mom who are also moms, we have more carefree relationships in terms of complaining, commiserating, checking in, and supporting each other.
Speaking of which, tell us about your mama meet cute. So for my work as a babywearing consultant, I go to people’s houses with my carriers and my demo doll and we talk about babywearing. They get a chance to practice and I troubleshoot if they’re having issues with any of the carriers. I connect with a lot of parents through my work but there was one woman in particular, Gaia, who was very eager. She was interested in these special, woven wraps that I really love and don’t get to teach very often. I also showed her how to nurse in the ring sling, which is a more advanced skill, and she was totally rocking it. I always give my phone number to my clients so they can send me photos or ask questions later on and so Gaia and I kept in touch.
When did your relationship change from client-consultant to friends? Gaia continued to share her successes and her love for babywearing with me. Towards the end of my pregnancy I needed someone to take over my babywearing meetups and I thought of her: 'my most successful client!' She was happy to do it. Then the pandemic started and everyone was trying to figure out for themselves if or how they could/should socialise. I had a newborn and she had a young baby so at one point I just asked if she wanted to go for a walk. And so we started our babywearing walks - she was the only person I saw for those lockdown months and it was really nice. She's become one of my closest friends here. You definitely seem to have inspired her babywearing journey. Has she inspired yours in any way?
Gaia has challenged me to wear my baby more because I see her dedication to babywearing. It's been a great boost. Even though I'm a babywearing consultant I still sometimes forget the lift it gives me when I get those cuddles and how much it helps him get in a better mood. Through the pandemic we've been home so much I've often not worn him as much. Getting selfies from Gaia of her babywearing adventures has inspired me to do the same. As she's learned, she's taught me.
So would you say this friendship has been important to you in your motherhood journey? If I look at my mom friendships, they’ve all been important sources of support and companionship - whether via Whatsapp or in-person - and they've all been very different. Gaia is very warm and caring and always checks in on me. We make the effort to tell each other that we're doing a great job - we all need that sometimes, right?
Yes, definitely! Thanks for taking the time to share your mama meet cute with us Zyanya!
This post was sponsored by Adelee, the new messaging app for sharing personal photos and videos to help cultivate better, closer relationships with the people who matter most to you. Whether you're looking for a fun way to stay in touch with a mama friend who lives halfway across the world or even in the same city, Adelee brings you closer. Available for download from the App Store now.